What is a Good Life? #85
Becoming Connected Citizens with Jon Alexander
On the 85th episode of the What is a Good Life? podcast, I am delighted to introduce our guest, Jon Alexander. Jon is the author of CITIZENS: Why the Key to Fixing Everything is All of Us, a book that seeks to reframe the current moment as one of immense civic opportunity rather than merely a time of crisis and collapse.
In 2014, Jon co-founded the New Citizenship Project, a strategy and innovation consultancy that aims to shift the dominant societal narrative from Consumer to Citizen. He is a Fellow of the Young Foundation, a founding member of the OECD's Innovative Citizen Participation Network, a Strategic Advisor to DemocracyNext, and a member of the Leadership Council of the Democracy and Culture Foundation. Additionally, Jon has represented Great Britain in both rowing and triathlon.
In this inspiring conversation, Jon shares his journey of building greater trust in himself and others, which has shaped his ideas about evolving from a Consumer story to a Citizen story. In this new narrative, we expand our self-interest, connection, and sense of belonging, embracing the uncertainty we collectively face. We discuss the importance of stories over data, becoming who we want to be, reflection, and the immense satisfaction of being part of something bigger than ourselves.
If you feel somewhat stuck and perhaps overwhelmed by the mounting crises, and if you are looking to reengage with a sense of agency and empowerment, this episode, along with Jon’s journey, will give you much to contemplate, as well as inspiration for action.
The weekly clip from the podcast (5 mins), my weekly reflection (3 mins), the full podcast (59 mins), and the weekly questions all follow below.
1. Weekly Clip from the Podcast
2. My weekly reflection
For context, Jon Alexander's "consumer story" refers to the dominant cultural narrative in which individuals are mostly seen, and see themselves, as consumers. This narrative suggests that happiness, success, and fulfilment are achieved through consumption—buying products, accumulating wealth, and perpetually seeking new experiences. Within this context, people are mainly defined by what they own, where they shop, and how much they can consume. It also influences people's identities and values, prompting a focus on materialism and individualism rather than on community and connection.
I find it unfortunate that much of the narrative around changing our consumer behaviour is often tilted towards sacrifice, willpower, and a sense of virtuosity, rather than the potential joys we are shielding ourselves from.
Over the past few years, as my connection with myself, the people in my life, and a sense of interconnectivity with the world around me has grown, much of what I’d consider the consumer story has fallen apart—like a meteor entering the atmosphere and disintegrating on contact.
This shift hasn’t been driven by willpower or any judgement towards what others are pursuing, but rather by a striking realisation: the more attention and energy I invest in my relationships with others and myself, the more I unlock a capacity for, and enjoyment of, connection that previously I wouldn’t have believed. This has dramatically reduced the importance of acquiring things, particularly when doing so would conflict with giving these relationships their time and attention.
A good analogy for this process is the use of my phone. Over the last couple of years, I started leaving my phone at home more often. Initially, it rarely accompanied me on dog walks, then when I was out with my daughter, and now hardly at all, as the more I did this, the more I continually got out of life.
I began to notice my own natural rhythms more, as well as the rhythms of my neighbourhood, the nature within it, and nature in general. I naturally connected more with people without a device in my hand, noticed how willing others were to connect, began detecting the smallest and most subtle shifts in myself and those around me, responded to whatever needs my daughter was gently expressing, and found even more time for my own contemplation and reflection.
Consequently, at this point in my life, I rarely have a planned routine for mindfulness. Without such a large distraction for chunks of the day that interferes with my natural awareness and attention, I have observed an effortless mindfulness and attention develop when free of technology.
Given what I have noticed emerging in place of time spent with an object that often leads to feelings of deficit, comparison, or scarcity for what I don’t have—whether lightly or strongly—simply paying attention to how I feel has led me to use my phone for just minutes a day, with no willpower required.
For the sake of some balance to this reflection, my laptop can still completely dominate and toy with my attention when I use it, but thankfully that is not something I can carry around in my pocket.
I see the use of our phones and the consumer story as significant obstacles to connecting with ourselves and others, to feeling that we are enough as we are, and to experiencing the level of connection and belonging that seems to be eluding us.
I understand that once we are caught up in it, these things feel almost essential to our existence; they are ubiquitous. And yet, if we can reclaim our attention, or offer it freedom or relief from what consumes it, I am convinced that we will naturally begin to notice what makes us feel alive and at home once more in this life.
I often hear the phrase "modern life is so busy," but I’d suggest that if you have neither a phone in your pocket nor an overpowering desire to consistently accumulate the latest updated version of what you already have, modern life doesn’t seem much busier than other times.
Despite all the latest mod cons and technological developments, what has always been essential to our well-being remains integral to it. We simply need to pay attention to what has stood the test of time and has always been essential—living a connected life with each other. I am finding more frequently that these realisations often don’t come with adding a new technique, process, or belief to my life, but clearing or creating space, through which something else can naturally emerge.
3. Full Episode - Becoming Connected Citizens with Jon Alexander - What is a Good Life? #85
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4. This week’s Questions
Is there any project in your local neighbourhood that you've frequently thought about contributing to or creating, but haven't yet?
What could you experiment with letting go of to create more space in your life?
About Me
I am a coach, podcast host, and writer, based in Berlin, via Dublin, Ireland. I started this project in 2021, for which I’ve now interviewed over 200 people. I’m not looking to prescribe universal answers, more that the guests’ lines of inquiry, musings, experiences, and curiosities spark your own inquiry into what the question means to you. I am also trying to share more genuine expressions of the human experience and more meaningful conversations.
If you would like to work with me to explore your own lines of self-inquiry, experiences I create to stimulate more meaningful group conversations, trust, and connection, or you simply want to get in touch, here’s my email and LinkedIn.
Great interview. V thoughtful and thought provoking. It's the first of your podcast episodes I've listened to, I love your calm considered questions.
Hi Lynda, thank you very much for the comment. I generally have the sense of myself and the guest going for a slow walk, no rush for answers really just an exploration of a question.